Which Parenting Style is Most Encouraged in Modern America

Which Parenting Style is Most Encouraged in Modern America

Do you have doubts about how to raise your children? How to educate him correctly? Don’t worry, today we are going to explain 4 parenting styles that will help you decide.

First, it is important that you know that there is a lot of literature written on the different parenting styles. Therefore, our advice is that you do not decide on a 100% style, but rather combine what most convinces you of each one.

Currently, a model that is much talked about is the one proposed by the psychologists MacCoby and Martin in 1983, which is based on two axes: the parental demand towards children, and the parental willingness to respond. From their interaction, four basic parenting styles are defined:


Authoritarian parenting style

A strong control in terms of demand, little willingness and reciprocity define the authoritarian parenting style . Here it is the adults who are in charge, and the children who are silent and obey. They are parents who expect a lot from their children, they impose a large number of rules and if they are not complied with, they apply punishments.

On the other hand, they are not usually affectionate with their children, but rather distant. Children are usually submissive and obedient, have low self-esteem, or rebel in adolescence against so many rules.


Permissive parenting style

By contrast, permissive parents are those of relaxed control, high availability, and reciprocity for children’s needs. Today it is common to hear about “helicopter parents”, those who fly over their children, waiting to satisfy even the smallest of their whims and who do not know how to say “no”. The permissive parenting style is based on setting few (or no) limits, which is detrimental to these children, who later have difficulties functioning academically and socially and often behave like little bullies.


Authoritative parenting style

It is also known as the democratic parenting style . The most balanced. It knows how to combine strong control with high availability. They are parents who set clear rules, but are open to dialogue and explain their reasons. Their children receive support and affection as well as limits, and they usually grow up with high self-esteem, empathy towards others , and leadership abilities.


Neglectful parenting style

Laid control, low reciprocity and affection result in the neglectful parenting style . They are neglected fathers and mothers, who do not support their children nor are they emotionally or physically available to them. Neglectful Parent style do not demand much of their children, but they are not caring or affectionate either. They delegate parenting to third parties, such as the school institution. Their children grow up abandoned, with poor self-esteem, they don’t know how to follow rules and they have problems in social interaction.

Of course, these four parenting styles are not usually given “pure”, but are an idealization. However, it does not hurt that you know them in order to reflect on how you want to raise your children.


It is clear that there is no one-size-fits-all answer when it comes to the question of which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America. However, the overall trend seems to be towards positive and constructive approaches that focus on building up the child’s self-esteem and encouraging positive behavior.